So far, this winter has been a man’s winter.  At least, it has here in the Northeast.    Just this past weekend, we got hammered with 2 feet of snow and another foot is expected tonight (where’s your global warming now, Al Gore?).  Personally, I’m happy that winter has decided to show itself at last.  There hadn’t been a decent snowfall since ’96 and many of my teenage winters were spent traveling north for snowboarding on man-made snow, or my personal favorite, “mud-boarding.”  I longed for the serious snow fall we used to get when I was a kid.  You could make a snowman without rolling bare patches in your lawn and it would last all winter.  Of course, now that I’m older, snow takes on a different meaning.  Don’t get me wrong, I still love it.  There’s nothing quite like walking through the trees while snow is falling silently around you.  In fact, snow is pretty much pure awesome in every category save two:  driving and shoveling.  The former deserves a post all its own, but we’re going to focus on the latter for today’s discussion.

                Shoveling snow has always been one of those unpleasant tasks that have fallen squarely on the shoulders of the male of the species.  I’m tempted to say that all outdoor maintenance is usually the responsibility of the male, but I see a lot of women taking on some serious tasks.  Not just your typical gardening or even leaf raking but serious stuff like mowing the lawn and stump removal.  But shoveling just hasn’t made the gender leap yet, I suppose.  A big part of the reason is probably because it’s back-breaking labor.  Shoveling snow makes full use of your body under harsh conditions and is literally not for the faint of heart.  If you want to survive, you have to be prepared and you have to have a game plan. 

The Gear

                If you want to make yourself miserable, try doing a job with the wrong tools.  It’ll ruin your day, guaranteed.  The same is true for shoveling snow.  Not only do you need the right tools for removing the snow, but you need the right equipment for shielding your body from the elements and keeping yourself comfortable as you exert yourself. 

-Shovel

                OK, let’s get this out right off the bat:  you can use a snow-blower if you have one.  I don’t have one so I’m gonna take the position that a snow-blower is overkill for most driveway and sidewalk applications and, in general, is less manly.  If you give me a free snow-blower though, I might change my position.

                When it comes to choosing a shovel, if you’re like most guys, you take whatever’s left at the supermarket after a mad dash the night before the storm.    However, if you plan ahead of time, choose a shovel that works best for you.  You might have your eye on that 36” wide Behemoth that comes with a lifting belt and a hernia warning sticker.  However, bigger isn’t always better.  The bigger the blade, the heavier the load of snow you have to lift.  Get something that is wide enough to make a decent walking path with one pass but don’t go overboard.   Also, get something that’s built to last.  Wood and metal handles are nice but avoid plastic.  They tend to bend and the connections give pretty easily.   Also, get a shovel design that works for the type of shoveling you plan to do.  If you just need to clear a path, a push-shovel might be what you need.  They usually have long straight handles and a blade shaped like a plow.  For actual snow removal from point A to point B, you might want an ergonomic (bent) handled shovel.

-Clothing

                What you wear while you’re shoveling is very important.   You want to stay dry and warm while simultaneously allowing your body to cool itself as you exert yourself.  To achieve this, you don’t need super technical Thinsulex-Plastipont-Gorecrylic-Intellisilk outerwear.  Unless of course, you enjoy looking and sounding like a garbage bag full of aluminum foil wearing a diaper.   Nature has already figured out what works best in adverse conditions, so go with natural fibers.   Wool is an excellent insulator.   It’s warm, quiet, breathes well and is wind and water-resistant.  It even insulates when it’s soaking wet.   Wear as much wool as you can when in the snow. 

For specific items, I‘d recommend a thick wool Mackinaw coat, a wool Pendelton button down shirt and a Stormy Kromer hat (for when it’s snowing) or a Mad Bomber (for when you’re in Fargo).  A nice pair of East German surplus wool pants and some wool hunting socks will keep your bottom half warm and dry.

For covering your hands and feet, nothing protects like leather.    You might be tempted to break out your snowboarding boots and gloves, but they aren’t built for shoveling.  If you’ve ever tried to walk any distance in a pair of snow-boarding boots, you know they’re about as comfortable as a pair of Forrest Gump leg braces.  A good pair of Pac Boots by L.L. Bean, Schnee’s or Sorel will be much more comfortable and abrasion resistant.  I think they look pretty cool too, in a woodsy lumberjack kind of way.   When it comes to your hands,  they will take a serious beating when you’re shoveling and a cheap pair of gloves will ruin your day.  Go for leather mittens.  I’d suggest Chopper Mitts or the ultimate “GI Arctic Mitts.”  They’re equipped with rip-stop gauntlets that look like they go up to your shoulder and a soft wool SNAP (SNot Absorption Pad) on the back of each mitt.  I’m pretty sure you can handle liquid nitrogen with those bad boys. 

-Technique

                There’s a saying that I like to apply to everything I do.  It says:  “Work smarter, not harder.”  This is especially true when it comes to shoveling snow.  As soon as the snow stops, I see all of my neighbors make a mad dash outside to shovel every inch of accumulated snow in their driveways and sidewalks.  It usually takes them a couple of hours on average.  I go out too, but it takes me about 10 minutes and I smarmily wave goodbye to all of my neighbors when I’m done and watch them from my toasty living room for the rest of the afternoon.  I don’t have any less ground to clear than they do.  If anything, I have more since I live on a corner and have two sidewalks to clear.  But my secret is to shovel early and shovel often.  I go out while it’s still snowing and shovel every couple of hours or about 4-6 inches of accumulation.  Since it’s usually warmer when the snow is falling than it is once the front clears out, it’s actually more comfortable to do it this way.  No single pass is overly-strenuous and, once the snow stops, I just do a quick final pass and I’m done.   Here are a few additional tips that make shoveling easier:

·         Park your cars in the garage, if you have one (that isn’t stuffed full of crap you never use).  It’s easier and faster to shovel a flat driveway than it is to clear off a car.

·         Don’t drink coffee or your usual six pack of Red Bull before shoveling.  Caffeine is a stimulant, which increases your heart rate and causes your blood vessels to constrict. This places extra stress on the heart.  That’s bad ju-ju.

·         Drink plenty of water. Dehydration is just as big an issue in cold winter months as it is in the summer.

·         Warm up your muscles before shoveling by playing in the snow for a while. Warm muscles are happy muscles and everyone could use a good snowball fight.

·         Begin shoveling slowly to avoid placing a sudden demand on your heart. Pace yourself and take breaks as needed.   It’s not a race (unless your neighbor also reads this blog, in which case, it’s on!).

·         Protect your back from injury by lifting correctly.  Bend from the knees (not the back) and tighten your stomach muscles as you lift the snow. Avoid twisting movements. If you need to move the snow to one side reposition your feet to face the direction the snow will be going.

·         Most importantly — listen to your body. Stop if you feel death pain!